Five Character Traits to Look for When You Are Ready to Start Back Dating
When are you ready to date? Simple answer: “When you are not ready to settle for less than being with a person that compliments the best of what you’ve identified as our non negotiables!”
Important to remember: You should never consider dating when you’re on a rebound.
The person who gets dumped is usually the one who has the most difficult time dealing with the break up.
• An unfortunate focus takes place where the one left behind begins wondering what they did that made the other person leave them.
• They start wondering whether or not they’re attractive enough, loveable enough, intelligent enough, passionate enough, or pliable. Unfortunately, the list can go on.
• Bottom line you are trying to figure out how to make yourself more desirable for the next person.
• Your confidence is low and you need a self-esteem boost, you need a quick pick me up, no pun intended, so you’re apt to be less selective.
This is the absolute worst thing you can do. It’s enough you’re already dealing with the loss of one relationship only to find yourself jumping out of the frying pan then subsequently landing into the proverbial skillet, no better off than before, sometimes worse off than before.
You’ve entered the caution zone: Ensure that you are healed from the last encounter and completely come to grips with the valuable person you are first before you even consider a new relationship!!
Once you’ve reminded yourself how fabulous you are. Once you’ve reminded yourself that you are that person’s loss. Here some nuggets to chew on:
List of the Five Character Traits to Look for:
1. Must have a demonstrated life that reflects your values and principles.
2. Must have a servant’s heart. Here you will see if the individual will lay down their rights and consider your wants and desires some of the time that you in turn will reciprocate and there will be mutual satisfaction in this area. (You can’t be greedy and want someone who will lay down their rights all the time, that’s effectively a doormat.)
3. Must accept and love you for who you are; no changes. This is not to say that there isn’t room for growth, it just shouldn’t be the condition for a future together. Neither should be trying to change, redefine, mold, or reprogram another to create the other into what you believe the ideal mate is. You must be prepared to stay the course, meaning if marriage comes about, then you marry this person with the realization that nothing may change and the question must be asked can you honestly live with this person just the way they are for the rest of your natural life, because that’s what marriage is until death do you part!
4. You should be looking for someone who enhances who you are – not replaces who you are. Someone who brings value and vice versa. Your happiness is your responsibility and not theirs. Never look for someone to make you happy as you’ll always be looking for someone.
5. Look for someone who can not only lead but follow. Great leaders no only guide but they also follow sound instruction and encouragement.
Now clearly you may have some things you want to add to your list sense of humor, athletic, etc. Just ensure that the basics are in place, the five above. The five will last you through your natural life the other traits added may subside with age.